Thursday, January 16, 2014

what my patients taught me this week.


i love being a nurse for a lot of reasons, but just the stories they tell me and the things i see amaze me.  someday i am going to forget, so i decided i am going to document some of what i hear and see.  it all varies from serious, ornery, sick, and funny.  no day is ever the same, obviously.

my patients make me feel good when they tell me that i am an angel or i am the reason they made it through the day, but i also have the most thankless job when i am screamed at, used like a drug dealer, maid, and whatever else you might think of.  no matter what, it is a pretty cool job and i really like most of the people i take care of.  so, here are just a couple things i noticed the last couple of days.  who knows what i may see and hear tomorrow!

1)  turpentine and castor oil will take away aches and pains if you mix 3:1 parts and rub it on the part that is bothering you.  it doesn't smell good at all, but it will make you feel better.

2)  god is what makes a marriage stay strong and keeps it together.  without him, it will not last.

3)  heroin makes you feel like you are snuggling on the couch with your boyfriend for 7 hours and makes you feel warm, fuzzy, and totally relaxed.

4)  do what makes you happy like jumping out of airplanes, shooting guns, and drinking beer, when you're eighty-five!

5)  a person can live for a week sitting in exactly the same spot, oh say a recliner, if one has a stocked cooler next to them- that's all that person needs.  may not be pleasant after that one week (if you know what i mean) but it can be done, and one will survive. 

6)  a man's scrotum can really get to be the size of a small cantaloupe! 




Sunday, January 5, 2014

skinny crockpot chili



not sure if you're in blizzard like conditions where you live, but we haven't had snow like this since i've been alive i don't think.  right now it's as white as my eyes can see and we have about a foot of snow!  that's a lot for us. 

when we are stowed up inside for days and can't leave, what else is there to do besides blog, hang out, and eat, right?!  well i make this a few times a year and this recipe makes for the perfect snowy day supper.  it's pretty low in calories, hearty, and keeps me warm.  i should've posted sooner because i know others are in the same position, but if you have these items on hand, there is still time to make today or even tomorrow.  go ahead, you will be happy you did!

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1 lb lean turkey
1 onion, chopped
1 can kidney beans
1 can diced tomatoes
1 can tomato sauce
1 packet organic chili powder
1/2 tsp salt
1/4 cup water 

brown turkey and onion together.  combine everything together in crockpot and cook on low for 6 hours or on high for 3 hours. super simple and tastes great!